the good makes the bad not so bad

the good:

- grayson's new words (there are new ones every day)

- afternoon walks with my boy and my mom

- unexpected sunshine - they have called for rain and clouds every day this week and yet every day the sun has made its appearance. praise Jesus.

- flipflops

- bennett's continued health and growth - no signs of anemia today at our appointment! yay!

- 3D pictures of bennett - another boy that looks like his daddy!

- group texts with my best friends

- going to bed early

- painted finger nails and toenails

the not so bad:

i have gestational diabetes.  which means i have to plan my meals, write down everything i eat, count my carbs, and stick myself four times a day to check my blood sugar. but it could be so much worse. i'm praying that during these first few weeks of planning and monitoring that i will be able to keep my sugar levels under control and that i won't need insulin. for a healthy baby - it will all be worth it :)

My Big Boy & His First Night in the Toddler Bed

When did Grayson get so big? I think it might have been last night. Although the past week or so he has been so funny. He has been repeating our every word (except most of the time he refuses to try "love you") and has become so determined. If he makes up his mind that he wants something or wants to try something, he has a hard time forgetting it. I can see where the terrible twos are slowly approaching. We try to remind him not to cry over what he wants but to tell us - but that's hard too since he can't say everything he wants - so we model, model, model.

Anyways - last night our toddler baby took another big step towards growing up. On the drive home I basically decided his bigger (mostly 18 month clothes) needed to be pulled out of the closet along with his summer stuff and that some of the 6 and 9 month things that were still in his drawer needed to be put away. But along with this - I decided we needed to go ahead and rearrange his room and put the toddler bed in there. And of course - I didn't stop there. Once it was all set up and ready to go - I figured Grayson might as well go ahead and make the leap to sleeping in the toddler bed.

So Grayson's room has now become Grayson AND Bennett's room. I'm actually surprised at how spacious it still looks. I did have to move the glider out to the living room but I figured that would be ok anyways because I don't want to disturb Grayson by nursing and rocking Bennett in their room while he's sleeping. Anyways - I'm so excited that I can finally see how my boys will share the space. I guess my nesting is kicking in a little early this time around.

So here's how bedtime went:

8:00 comes. I'm thinking maybe this is a bad idea but I take Grayson to his new bed and lay him down and I sit on his little bed with him. He immediately started crying and looking around like "you're not seriously going to leave me here, are you?" but I just pushed through and started to say our prayers. I just kept wiping away his little tears and telling him he was fine. Then here comes daddy to the door. Daddy says "I'll talk with him." like he's a 13-year-old to reason with? But regardless - he sits on the bed with him and tells me to turn out the light. So I snap a picture, kiss him goodnight, and sneak off to the living room to wait it out. A few minutes later Brandon comes out and I ask if he's already sleeping. He says "no, he's just laying there." which is what he always does. He's not crying so I just silently pray that he stays there and falls asleep. Sure enough 15 minutes later I sneak in to check and he is asleep. My sweet toddler baby has become more toddler and less baby.

He did wake up once at around 1:00 and cried a bit because his paci wasn't with him. I also think he was hungry because he gulped down lots of milk. Daddy laid him back down and he slept until I woke him up packing my lunch at about 6:45.

All in all - it was so easy. Too easy really. I'm still mentally preparing for this not to work - but for now - he's doing so great! I still need to find out what daddy is telling him when he tucks him in. It must be something good. :)

Our boy's room

B's side

G's side

Testing out the new bed

Daddy having his "talk"

Morning Success!!

25 weeks pregnant

I love this stage. I know it's going to get worse. I will start swelling in my hands and feet, my face will get fat, I will get up 100 times to pee every night. I will get heartburn and indigestion and being on my feet all day at school will start to get really hard. 

But for now, I'm loving this pregnancy. Bennett is kicking and squirming constantly and I feel pretty energetic still (minus the time change). I still like some of my clothes and I can still wear my toms :) Life is good.

I still am having to go every two weeks to Hickory to see Maternal Fetal Medicine and it's looking like I will get to go about 6 more times before Bennett gets here. It's annoying and expensive and it makes me nervous every time, but I am so thankful that my numbers have stayed pretty steady.  

On Friday at the doctor - Bennett weighed in at 1 lb 12 oz and was growing perfectly on track. There was no concerning excess fluid and the rate of flow of his blood confirms that he's not becoming anemic. We did discuss my birthing options. It's something that I've been really concerned about lately. And although I still don't know anything for sure - it is looking like Bennett might be making his appearance closer to 37 weeks. I will opt for the c-section this time even though sometimes I still wish I could have my all-natural vaginal birth. It's most likely that it will be safer for him to be a couple weeks early rather than to stay in longer and possibly be more severely jaundiced or anemic which would lead to the need for a blood transfusion. And although VBACs are becoming more popular, I don't know that I can go through 2 hours of pushing only to be forced into a c-section anyway all over again.

The other concern I have is where I will deliver. I want to deliver at Watauga but it's kind of unsettling that there isn't a NICU should the need arise so we may be opting to deliver in Hickory just so I will feel better. But I guess this is another wait-and-see kind of thing. Patience. Because at any ultrasound things could change the plan anyway. And maybe the ultrasounds will make me feel better. They will check out every part of this little guy to make sure it's safe for him to come into the world. But regardless - it is looking like my June baby may be a May baby and that both excites and terrifies me.